Ok, so starting out we see that "humor" is a topic that apparently is often misunderstood, and that people don't know what "The Onion" is....
Moving on...
Are they trying to say being 1/4th as good as one thinks one is means one looses four times as many fights as one wins?
That's not what "4000% less effective in fights" means, even if it wasn't humor.
Every one-on-one fight results in either one winner, one loser or a draw (two losers or two winners?). Ignoring the draws there cannot be four times as many losers as winners unless the winners are in four times as many fights. A person who loses four times as many fights as he wins will probably avoid fighting.
Again, even if this article was serious, that isn't what was meant. After all, "effectiveness" may be partially measured by direct outcome, but the count of direct outcome is not the same thing as actual effectiveness versus expected effectiveness.
Regardless, no matter how good a guy thinks he is there is always a "faster draw", which he'll meet if he continues provoking or responding to provocations. And, one cannot discount the lucky punch.
Yes, that's exactly what this article was about. It was a warning to people that indeed, eventually you'll run into someone better.
As Mud says:
There's always someone better than you. It might be me.
But that ISN'T what it is really about.
It isn't that "someone might be better than you" -- it is really that most people don't know anything, and they suck at fighting. It isn't that there is that One Guy out there who can outfight you--it is that almost ANYONE who is violent is better than you.
...and yet, the reason this humor is so effective is that:
1) Apparently people miss the point and take this seriously, but more importantly
2) It is really talking about the fact that most males really DO think they can defend themselves, that their fighting ability is high, and that they can "take care of themselves" in causes of altercation---and they are pretty much wrong.
One of the things I say every time I teach a women's self-defense class is that most men think they already know how to defend themselves, and most women think that they can't defend themselves--and both groups are very, very wrong.
Fighting and self-defense aren't the same thing. And most men can't fight, much less defend themselves effectively. They've had no training, learned nothing about it, and don't understand violence at all. As such, they vastly overestimate their own abilities.
This is true in the firearms self-defense world also, of course. People whose self-defense draw is such that they'd never get the gun out in time, whose technique is such that even at contact distance they are likely to miss, whose awareness is completely lacking--but who THINK that they are the sheepdogs among the sheep whose tactical awareness magically keeps them safe.
The guy at the end of the video on the link is someone I've run into many times in the martial arts community (and when discussing martial arts). Transpose what he is saying to firearms self-defense, and I'm met plenty of "that guy" also.
It amuses me that many people watching that video (and reading what was at the link) will think "Yeah, that's true" but completely miss the fact that it means THEM in additional all the other people they are thinking about.
We've seen pronouncements regarding self-defense practice on this forum that were just ridiculous in terms of reality. (Some of which people have called out, some of which people have just left alone.) Whether empty hand or armed, most males have a vastly over-inflated sense of innate toughness that just doesn't exist.
And it is funny how many people don't realize how funny this link really is....