Have a chance to lighten up the ban topic here my part:
I bet it works in Chicago too.....
How to install a Southern Home Security System.
1. Go to Goodwill and buy a pair of size 14-16 men's work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine
3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Bubba,.......
Me and Virgil, T-Bone, and Jimmy Earl went for more ammo and a gallon of sweet tea. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls. They got the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside. Be right back.
Stole this from a email I was sent ......